FEAR
AND ANXIETY - GAMES MATRIX - V
When you are dealing with present time FEARS and ANXIETIES
you will run into a tremendous amount of very fixed automatic Red
Zone destructive solutions and locked in mortal combat games conditions.
It is the constant dealing with continuous FEARS and ANXIETIES
that are the core causes of the formation of the inhibiting Games Matrix
Packages.
People with continuous FEARS and ANXIETIES
in present time tend to go into hiding as being known and standing out is
too much stress.
It is their solutions to FEARS and ANXIETIES
that causes the being deliberately to misuse theirs and others infinite
power, infinite intelligence, infinite abilities, infinite cleverness, infinite
strength, infinite skills in order to restrain and inhibit their dreams
and power – to obsessively seek out Red Zone destructive
solutions and locked in mortal combat games conditions
by getting others to mutually agree-upon consensus of opinions (group realities)
in order to collectively restrain and inhibit their dreams and power - and
these FEARS and ANXIETIES are therefore
almost always completely based on false, stupefying, and degrading realities
which constantly puts them into the wrong place, at the wrong time, with
the wrong people.
Millions of years of evolution have endowed you, your mind and body with
a set of automatic spiritual, mental and physical weapons that take over
in the event of an emergency.
At the body level - the sight or sense of danger or threat, (whether real
or imagined) your hypothalamus sends a message to your adrenal glands and
within seconds, you can run faster, hit harder, see better, hear more acutely,
think faster, and jump higher than you could only seconds earlier.
Your heart is pumping at two to three times the normal speed, sending
nutrient rich blood to the major muscles in your arms and legs. The tiny
blood vessels (called capillaries) under the surface of your skin close
down (which consequently sends your blood pressure soaring) so you can
sustain a surface wound and not bleed to death. Even your eyes dilate
so you can see better.
All functions of your body not needed for the struggle about to commence
are shut down. Digestion stops, sexual function stops, even your immune
system is temporarily turned off. If necessary, excess waste is eliminated
to make you light on your feet.
The autonomic nervous system is the body’s control center for stress.
When the HPA-axis (Hypothalamus Pituitary Adrenal) is stimulated, the
autonomic nervous system activates the “fight or flight” mechanism
and shifts cells from growth mode to self-protection.
The response is immediate, mobilizing the body’s resources for
immediate physical activity.
The above process that activates “fight or flight” can lead
to a health crisisone cell at a time.
Every time you misperceive, misrepresent or you feel you are threatened
by the sight or sense of danger or threat, (whether real or imagined)
your body triggers the fight or flight response it also triggers mind
responses and even identity responses - for situations that are not truly
life-threatening, you are experiencing, in effect, a false alarm.
Millions of years of being hunted are always playing subconsciously in
your mind and body – then you find out - your boss is out hunting
too. But guess what? He's hunting for you.
As you gulp down your third cup of coffee you hear your boss say those
dreaded words: "Could I see you for a moment in my office, please?"
At the sight of the tiger, er, uh...your boss...your hypothalamus sends
a message to your adrenal glands and within seconds your body summons
all the same powers that your stone-age ancestor needed to fight a sabre
tooth tiger.
You can almost feel your blood pressure soar as you take the long walk
down the hall to your bosses’ office. You remember a rumor you heard
about an upcoming round of firings.
Now your mind is racing, your heart is pumping, your blood pressure is
soaring, your mouth dries up, your hands feel cold and clammy, your forehead
is perspiring and you may even feel a sudden urge to go (to the bathroom).
As you imagine your boss is about to destroy you utterly. The caveman
inside of you wants to come out. Maybe you'd like to run and hide or maybe
you'd like to punch your boss in the nose, but you can't do either. Welcome
to the modern “Golden Age of Politically Correct Behavior.”
era.
As your boss ushers you into his office and closes the door, you're experiencing
a full-blown episode of the fight or flight response. But since you can't
fight and you can't flee, all of that energy is pent-up inside of you
with no place to go. You feel like you're going to explode. Your boss
begins to speak. "Here it comes," you think to yourself. But
you're so shocked by what you hear you can't believe you heard it right.
"What did you say?" you ask your boss. "I have decided
to give you a promotion and an increase in salary as the new head of marketing,"
he repeats.
Too many false alarms can lead to stress-related disorders like, heart
disease, high blood pressure, immune system disorders, migraine headaches,
insomnia and sexual dysfunction, which if not handled over a period of
many years can predispose you to cancer, ALS, and other degenerative diseases.
The above example from the modern era was doubly false since the fight
or flight response was in anticipation of an event (such as “getting
fired or your reputation being utterly destroyed”) that never materialized.
People create a multiplicity of False-selves or Substitute
Identity Strategies to manage Fear (distrust of self)
and Anxiety (distrust of others.)
From trial and error, ruling personality sub-selves or substitute
identities develop habitual ways to cope with their fears and other inner
wounds.
These ways become semi-conscious, unconscious or involuntary
responses (reflexive), until de-accessing recovery coaching and processing
procedures brings them into conscious awareness.
Some common autonomic habitual strategies are...
1. Dominating (“I will crush the opponent.”)
2. Attacking (“I will overwhelm anyone who gets in my way.”)
3. Fighting (“I will make them wrong for trying to control or help
me.”)
4. Intellectualizing and over-analyzing (“I can think my way out
of this.”)
5. Fleeing (“I will make myself poor, weak and invisible and hide
out.”)
6. Neglecting (“I don’t care, nothing matters.”)
7. Succumbing (“I will give in, quit, and have nothing more to do
with it.”)
8. Numbing (“I don’t feel anything.”)
9. Avoiding (“I’m not going to bother with those boring studies.”)
10. Over-focusing on the past or the future - a form of avoiding the present.
11. False sense of superiority (“A legend in their own mind - I
know more than anyone else – after all I have spent years studying
this subject.”)
12. Procrastinating (“I’ll get around to getting trained one
of these days soon.”)
13. Self-distracting via chemicals, activities, sleep, fantasizing, and/or
obsessing (“mind churning”)
14. Minimizing (“Yeah, I’m a little uncomfortable, but not
scared.”);
15. Catastrophizing – (Compulsively mentally preparing poverty mindsets
by creating destructive or degrading visions of disastrous events and
situations that contain the very worst possible outcomes, however unlikely
it may be.)
16. Denying (“Nah! I’m not scared of bankruptcy.”)
17. Lying - (“Why no, I haven’t had a cigarette or a drink
in weeks!”)
18. Compulsively over-controlling feelings, relationships, conversations,
objects and situations
Habitual fear-protections like these tend to reinforce each other - e.g.
“I feel stupid and guilty for catastrophizing all the time, so I
minimize my worries, don’t think about them, ‘keep busy,’
and I don’t tell other people how uneasy I am most of the time.
I know I shouldn’t do these things so much, but I can’t help
it.”
COMMON BEHAVIORAL SYMPTOMS
Frequent dominance of over-fearful sub-selves causes common behaviors.
The behaviors are usually shaped by other false-self wounds. See which
of these may feel “familiar” in you or someone you know...
1) Over-avoidance of inevitable inner and interpersonal conflicts; “My
partner and I never fight!”
2) Compulsive pleasing, helping, and/or rescuing key adults and kids.
3) Freezing, panicking, exploding, fleeing, or aggressing when others
emote strongly.
4) Equating a raised or intense voice or face with “You’re
yelling at me.”
5) Repeatedly rationalizing and tolerating toxic, demeaning, and depleting
relationships.
6) Habitual black/white (bi-polar) thinking; a major discomfort with
ambivalence and uncertainty.
7) “Unreasonable” guilt and/or anxiety (“worry”)
over crying or raging.
8) Chronic “free-floating” anxiety.
9) Compulsive, unnecessary apologizing (also a symptom of excessive shame).
10) Often “walking on eggshells” with key other people, and
doing nothing about it.
11) Frequent high discomfort asserting needs and opinions, saying “no,”
or confronting self or others - i.e. difficulty setting clear, appropriate
personal boundaries and enforcing related consequences.
12) Identifying with or vehemently denying co-dependence (also a toxic-shame
symptom).
13) Compulsively choosing approach-avoid or no relationships despite
painful outcomes.
14) Automatically repressing (“numbing”) and/or withholding
(not expressing) some or most emotions.
15) A notable compulsion to control people, events, perceptions, and/or
feelings; Inner or social excessive preoccupation with “what if…”.
16) Major discomfort with and/or avoidance of changing beliefs, behaviors,
and/or surroundings (taking risks); Living an overly-structured, ritualized
life; “never going out or traveling.”
17) Repeatedly picking “emotionally-unavailable” (abusive
or victimish) partners, and complaining about that, denying it, or “not
noticing” it.
18) Compulsively “shading the truth” or lying, directly or
by omission, and denying it.
19) A history of relationship cutoffs and “failures,” including
divorces or failed relationships.
20) An obsessive need for clear “rules” and “plans,”
and predicting the future
21) Avoidance of, or inability to tolerate, emotional and/or physical
intimacy.
22) Avoidance of, or high ambivalence about, personal commitment.
23) Smiling and/or chuckling (mixed signals) when scared, confused, hurting,
or angry.
24) Frequent inability to describe current feelings (emotions and/or
body sensations.)
25) Computing “what I (should) feel now” vs. spontaneously
feeling.
26) Excessive procrastination, and/or being habitually late and claiming
“I can’t help it.”
27) Chronic facial tics, jaw grinding, and/or muscle, head, or stomach
aches or pains.
28) “Always” being analytic, intellectual, and “in my
head.”
29) Being unable to describe clearly “what I (don’t) like.”
30) Feeling or showing no appropriate shock, anger, and sadness (grief)
over major physical or abstract losses (also a symptom of difficulty connecting
or bonding). These are common ascension/abuse addiction symptoms.
31) Frequently “not breathing” (breathing shallowly), and
being unaware of that until someone points it out. A related symptom is
frequent use of tobacco, which reduces oxygen-absorption and feeling emotions
- like fear.
32) “Never” arguing, getting angry or “upset,”
or showing strong emotions without major anxiety, guilt, and apologizing.
33) Often having an expressionless face, a “frozen” body,”
and/or a “flat” voice.
34) Periodic “depressions” and/or uncontrollable rage or
weeping “attacks,” despite painful personal and social consequences
- including post-attack shame, guilt, and fear of going ”out of
control” again.
35) Frequent catastrophizing - focusing on the worst possible outcome/s
of human or Natural situations, and having a steady cynical, skeptical,
or pessimistic view of life.
36) Stubbornly justifying or denying avoidance of appropriate professional
medical, spiritual, and psychological help in person or in the media.
These are some (not all) common symptoms of excessive false-self fears.
Much of this bulletin is an adaptation of an article written by Peter
K. Gerlach, MSW. Copyright © 1997-2004, by Peter K. Gerlach, MSW
which states: This and related Stepfamily in Formation Web pages and articles
may be cited, quoted, excerpted, and/or copied and distributed if appropriate
credits are clearly given to me and the source (Stepfamily in Formation
- http://sfhelp.org); and no financial profits accrue. If you wish to
profit, please contact me. These ideas aim to augment, not replace, appropriate
professional help.
Observe for a moment one of your most common non-inspected fears.
How have these false or imagined fears and anxieties been shaping the
creations of your present time identities, your fixed inhibiting mindsets
that in turn shape your inhibited life, your inhibited relationships,
and your inhibited levels of success, finances, occupation, and health?
Can you imagine how great it would be to be completely free of
your false fears and false anxieties – to be completely free of
your restraining inhibitions – to be completely free of procrastination
- to be completely free of self induced confusions and feelings of stupidity
– to be completely free to be fully yourself – to be completely
free to create the life you want - to be completely free to enjoy yours
and others life and powers!
ALAN C. WALTER
10 January 2008
Copyright Ó 2008
Alan C. Walter
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
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